Joe B & Locker, Finga Gunzz

It didn't take long for Washington Capitals announcers Joe Beninati and Craigh Laughlin to give us our first regular season Caps GIF of 2013.  Much like Gilbert Arenas, Joe B & Locker decided to go with a DC Classic, the Finga Gunzz!

Braden Holtby Tries To Score Empty Net Goal

With the Washington Capitals up 2 goals in the final seconds, Braden Holtby decided that Alex Ovechkin isn't the only one who can score a goal.  The Washington netminder took hold of the puck behind his net, brought the puck up around the net, and tried to fire a bank shot off the boards and into the Buffalo Sabres awaiting empty net.

Instead the puck went to Alex Ovechkin who caught the puck...no goal this time for Holtby...Here are what the announcers had to say about it:

Locker: "He's gonna try to score"

Joe B: "Go Hotlby...PLEASE!"

Locker: "I knew he was going to"

Joe B:  "One of these days"

Locker: "He didn't get all of that, but he was thinkin' why not me...I LOVE IT!...Wait was that his 200th, 300th goal, what was that?"

Craig Laughlin With A St. Patrick's Day Telestrator Sign-Off

On Sunday evening at Verizon Center the Washington Capitals were celebrating St. Patrick's Day.  Joe Be had his bright green tie on, but for some reason, Locker didn't go with green.

Down on the ice the Caps were wearing very ugly green uniforms for warmups which they will give away for charity.

During the 2nd Intermission Hold It Here Telestrator moment (like this one, and this one) Craig Laughlin signed his name on the telestrator with an added object.  Joe B though it was an ascot, but as Locker explained it was a Leprechaun hat for St. Patrick's Day.

Why wouldn't you draw a SHAMROCK locker, duh!  Why is a hat the first thing that comes to mind.  Also...worst hat drawing ever?

"I get it...I thought you were drawing an ascot...it's a little donkey's bed" - Joe B's terrible zinger!  Get it Ass Cot...

Joe B Tries To Steal Locker's Checkbook...or Something

Locker signed the telestrator again in a sloppy way and when Joe B said he was trying to make out the signature to see what it said, Locker replied:

"No I can't let you do that because then you will steal my checkbook!"

Joe B replied "That was my plan..."

The Sports Junkies In The Booth With Joe B And Locker

During Friday night's Washington Capitals vs Philadelphia Flyers contest, the Sports Junkies Eric Bickel and Cakes joined Joe Beninati and Craig Laughlin in the booth to promote their new show Table Manners that is going to be on CSN.

Caps fans, to say the least, were outraged, voicing their anger on Twitter.  There were hundreds.  Here are a few:

EB started off by putting his arms around Joe B during the interview.  He then screamed into the mic:

"WE NEED SOME OFFENSE WHERES THE OFFENSE WHERES OVI!!!"

EB Puts his hand around Joe B's neck

He then grabbed the mic out of Joe B's Hand and talked about why he was underdressed:

"THATS BECAUSE IM WEARING A DIAPER...YOU SEE HOW HIGH THESE GUYS ARE!"

The Junkies stayed in the booth for the game call.  While Cakes tried to do his best announcer impression, EB continued to think outside the box talking about the best part of their new show:

"AND WE DRINK, DON'T FORGET THAT, WE'RE DRINKING!"

Locker tries to get back to real life, but EB doesn't let it happen.  After talking for a second about the show, EB brings up drinking again.

"I WAS COMPLETELY HAMMERED BY THE END OF THE TAPING!"

EB Grabs the mic from Joe B's hand

Cakes threw in some zings while Joe B sounded upset and disappointed saying "Ay yi yi"

"I HAVE OFFERED TO MASSAGE BROOKS LAICH'S GROIN JUST TO GET HIM BACK!"

Joe B kept saying "Easy, Easy" while he was telling the story afraid what would come next.  Then Locker had a few comments semi-jokingly.

"I'm also glad you guys have about 30 seconds on the air" and We just lost some viewers".  

Then Joe B brought the subject of wine back up, all while throwing in some Junkies lingo "sillies".

"Have you tasted any sillies at the Palm"

Then when closing it out, the Junks talked about how they may not be perfect on camera, to which Locker threw in a zing.  "Don't worry you guys have already proven that" Then EB finished with:

"THERE ARE NO RULES, JUST DRINK MORE!"

Overall, it probably did not turn out as well as it could have.  I'm a big Junkies fan so I'm biased.  I loved it.  But as seen above and by Twitter searching, not many did.  I'll still be watching Table Manners. LOVE THE JUNKS!

Classic Locker & Joe B: Locker Signs Off The Broadcast

Thursday night's matchup between the Washington Capitals and Toronto Maple Leafs started off strong with Joe B & Locker wearing what appeared to be almost-matching suits.  Of course we all know about Joe B and his suits (if you don't, read here).

Later, after the end of the 1st period with Locker on the telestrator, he got a little fired up.  This time, it wasn't in an angry way at the "hold it here" guy.  Instead he was pumped up for a Joel Ward goal.  He got so amped that he basically dropped the mic and walked out, or the hockey announcer equivalent, which was signing his name on the telestrator.

Locker:  "Could you ever pound that!!!!!! and since were’ in Canada Joe B, I’m signing off, take us to break my good friend

Joe B: "Well..."

Locker: "Take us to break!!!"

Joe B: "Your signing off and you’re directing me????  ... Off to break we go...

Joe B Cracks Alex Semin Zing

In the 2nd period of Saturday night's game between the Washington Capitals and the Tampa Bay Lightning, Alexander Ovechkin was knocked to the ice by a TB player.  There was a penalty on the Tampa sid, but the refs thought that Ovi was embellishing the call and sent him to the box as well.

"An embellishment penalty?  Is that #8 or #28.  The old #28 who now resides in Carolina" - Joe Beninati

Good Ovi, Bad Ovi???

Earlier that day, on the prerecorded 106.7 preseason preview show, Joe B was tiptoing around saying that Semin was "addition by subtraction".  He clearly has been waiting to drop a zing like this, and he didn't have to wait long.

Semin was signed by the Carolina Hurricanes in the offseason as a free agent.

Caps Lessons For n00bz: Joe Beninati & His Suits

I was always wondering why Russian Machine Never Breaks had the "Joe B Suit Of The Night" for each game recap during the year. They even have a story called "Joe Beninati: The Year In Suits" which chronicles Joe B fashion in a slideshow from last season's games.

So I did some research and found some things out. Joe Beninati is one of the Capitals TV announcers. (Ok I already knew that) He used to have commercials (that I cannot find) for local suit store Bruno Cipriani in White Flint Mall. This probably helped him to accumulate his collection of suits. In a recent radio interview with the Sports Junkies, Joe B said he owned between 90 and 100 suits, not including all his sports jackets.

"I have dress shirts in so many different closets it is embarrassing" - Joe B

That is crazy. I have like 1 suit. You can turn 1 suit into 100 suits by wearing different shirts & ties! Although I'm not wearing a suit every day. Weddings, Funerals, Job Interviews. All the same suit...

Junkies Podcast - 10/26/2011 - Segment 11 - Starting at 12 Minutes (Link)